Sunday, January 25, 2009

Coffee Psalm 1:1-9

1:1 And the Lord COFFEE said unto them:
Long have thou waited, coffee hounds,
thou undercaffeinated wretches, my people;

1:2 Long have thou watched other neighborhoods elevated above thee,
proud that they have a coffee shop to walk to
and eat a vegan empanada if they want.

1:3 Now, thy patience has been rewarded;
thy faith has been rewarded;
and thy desires have been bestowed with treasures
because thou hast both a bar and a coffee shop.

1:4 Arise, thou coffee hounds, from thy misery, and cast off thy shackles;
Lo, the Corona Cafe opens,
On Monday January 26th,
and the first coffee will be poured at 7 am,
so thou must go to the coffee shop, the land of milk and honey,
and afterwards if thou desirest thou can get a tattoo
or get thy nails done.

1:5 And the coffee is hot and strong
and peeleth the sleep from thy eyes;
and the espresso is a tonic to the soul,
and affordable.

1:6 And the Lord COFFEE said:
Do not take the coffee shop for granted,
for it exists by thy goodness and for thy pleasure;
and speak no false words against it, such as
searching police records for crimes that occurred
before the shop had opened;
and do not hide behind false identities
or poison the email inboxes of thy neighbors.

1:7 And remember that the hope of Mueller
is a false hope;
and keep no false hopes before thee;

1:8 And lo, the fast food restaurants, the check-cashing joints,
the car washes: these will flee from Cameron Road,
and trees and gardens will overgrow the asphalt and replace it
with a minimum of city construction crews digging it up.

1:9 Other neighborhoods will wail and gnash their teeth
at the patheticness of their vegan empanadas,
Thy property values will increaseth;
Thy flocks multiply beyond measure;
And thou willest live with the clarity bestowest by COFFEE.


lindartist said...

my sentiments exactly! i was the first customer this morning, i am soooo proud! thanks for the blog, it's charming!

Kristin said...

Fantastic psalm! Both your writing and the truth behind it. :)